


Irreparable Damage

by clandestineyejin



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Abusive Father, Abusive Parents, Angst, Angst and Feels, Childhood Friends, Childhood Trauma, Enemies to Lovers, F/M, Flirt Oikawa, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Jealous Tsukishima Kei, Past Abuse, Reader-Insert, Tsukishima Kei is Bad at Feelings, no happy ending, tsukishima messed up, x Reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-14 11:26:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29417877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clandestineyejin/pseuds/clandestineyejin
Summary: Tsukishima knew he messed up the moment he said it. He knew he took the argument too far as he saw your expression turn from angry to hurt within an instant. He wanted to punch himself for seeing you flinch at his hand.
Relationships: Tsukishima Kei & Reader, Tsukishima Kei & Yamaguchi Tadashi, Tsukishima Kei/Reader
Comments: 1
Kudos: 44





	Irreparable Damage

“What are you doing.” Tsukishima’s deep voice quickly killed your happy mood. 

“Why do you wanna know? It’s none of your business,” you snarkily replied, clicking the home button on your phone to turn it off. You turned to find the tall blondie towering over you with a glare.

“It is when you’re standing in front of my locker. Move,” he ordered, pushing your shoulder off to the side, causing you to lose your balance. Scowling, you regained your composure and leaned against the locker next to his, tapping on the metal door with a perfectly painted nail. 

“Technically I was standing by  _ my _ locker, you insufferable idiot.” You and Tsukishima had a funny dynamic and “friendship” as Yamaguchi called it. Neither of you agreed on the word friend and considered yourselves people that just dealt with each other’s presence. There wasn’t a good word to describe your relationship with him. Since childhood you were always partnered together in class for some reason, causing you to unintentionally become close with him. More so with Yamaguchi, who you had met through Tsukishima and now considered one of your closest and only guy friends. If it weren’t for the fact that they knew about your family’s past and what you went through at home, you wouldn’t talk to them and they wouldn’t talk to you. They saw the bruises. They heard the screaming and crashing of bottles every time they came over for group work. But they also didn’t mention it, taking note of your silence and dismissal of your father’s abuse. After your mother had died and your father went to jail, the three of you just kept in the habit of hanging out with each other, even though you and Tsukishima always set Yamaguchi on edge with your bickering.

Tsukshima noticed your small smile and faint blush as you reread the text Oikawa had given to you just moments before he had arrived. He didn’t know why he was so curious, but Tsukishima couldn’t help himself from snatching your phone from your hands. 

“Hey! Give it back,” you yelled, trying to grab it back from his hand. Using his height against you, you could evidently see you wouldn’t be able to reach it from where he was reading it above his own head. 

“If you’re free on Friday, come over for a movie night? Tch,” Tsukishima read, scoffing at the sappy and horribly written offer. He didn’t know why he felt angry reading it, but he did. “Oikawa? Really, Y/N?” He tossed your phone back to you with an annoyed look, turning his attention back to his locker.

“What?” you asked, obviously offended at his comment. “I think it’s cute. And I’m obviously going to go.” As you started to unlock your own locker to get your books for your next class, you tucked your phone back into your skirt pocket. 

“He’s probably- no, I  _ know _ he is the biggest playboy in the entirety of the Miyagi Prefecture.” Tsukishima didn’t bother hiding his disapproval. Even outside of volleyball, he knew Oikawa was a troublemaker with girls. But what he couldn’t understand was why he was so upset about you being involved with him. 

“Oh really? Since when were you a know-it-all when it comes to Oikawa with a bachelor’s degree in relationship advice? One, I don’t remember asking and two, again, why do you even care?” you asked, rolling your eyes.

“I don’t,” he lied. 

“Oh but you do,  _ Tsukki, _ ” you teased with a smirk. 

“If you don’t shut up right now you’re gonna regret it-” Tsukishima warned, shooting daggers at you with his eyes. Yamaguchi was the only one who called him Tsukki but you still did it anyway just to set him off. Though he never liked being called that from anyone else, he hated more that he actually sort of liked hearing it from you. Nevertheless, he wasn’t good at expressing this unknown emotion so he showed it as anger. But before he could finish, a bright orange-haired boy in your year ran eagerly over to where you both stood. 

“Tsukishima!!! Oh, nice to meet you, I’m Hinata Shoyo,” Hinata introduced, acknowledging your presence next to Tsukishima.

“Hey Hinata, I’m Y/N,” you replied with a smile. Though you liked his energetic and friendly personality, you liked the fact that he bothered Tsukishima more. The irritated face he gave to Hinata widened your smile. “So why do you need to talk to Tsukki?” You pretended to ignore the irked boy's glare as he turned his attention back to you.

“I just had to pass on the message from Daichi that practice is going to run on for a little longer tonight since the Inter High is coming up!” Hinata exclaimed brightly. “But you must be Tsukishima’s friend since you called him Tsukki. Do you want to stop by later today and watch our practice?” The eagerness in his voice made it hard to decline, even with Tsukishima out of the picture.

“No. She’s not gonna-” Tsukishima started.

“Yes, actually. I’d  _ love _ to come watch.” You turned to give Tsukishima an innocent smile before walking off. “See you later Hinata!” They both exchanged smiles and waves.

“W-What?” Hinata asked, suddenly fearing for his life as he saw the menacing look Tsukishima was giving him. The only response he got was the slamming of Tsukishima’s locker door in his face.

\- 

The rest of Tsukishima’s day went horribly, causing him to feel more agitated than normal by the end of the day. Having you around during practice made him nervous while seeing your friendship blossom with Hinata bothered the shit out of him. During a longer water break towards the second half of the late-night practice, you finally sauntered over to him, giving him the perfect opportunity to talk to you about what had been bugging him all day.

“Hey Yamaguchi, Tsukishima,” you started with a smile.

“Oh hey, Y/N!” Yamaguchi said between sips.

“Don’t go on that date with Oikawa.” Yamaguchi choked on his water, looking at the two of you like you were crazy. He didn’t know about the texts. You crossed your arms, suddenly offended and surprised at the way Tsukishima was bossing you around. 

“What? No,” you scoffed. “Why are you telling me what to do?” He tried his best to ignore the anger that was bubbling up from his core. Everything pent up from the day was itching to get out.

“He’s not a good person. You’d be stupid to actually go out with him,” he snapped, with a disgusted look written clearly across his face.

“How can you say that? Have  _ you _ ever gone out with him? I didn’t think so. Don’t talk to me like that,” you spat back.

“Talk to you like what? I’m telling you facts, but you’re just too childish to listen.” His voice started to rise, earning a few glances from the rest of the team. You hated when people talked down to you like that. Especially Tsukishima. He was trying not to make a scene but knowing that you might actually get together with that douchebag was pushing his buttons. But you didn’t know the team well enough to care. You were just angry that he was acting like this.

“Why do you even care what I do with my own life,  _ Tsukki _ ,” you sneered at him. You could tell he was getting angry. Good. “You keep acting as if you’re so much better than everyone else but here’s the reality check no one else is willing to give you: you’re not. So how about you do everyone a favor, get off your high and mighty white horse, and realize how much of a dick you are! What I do is none of your business-”

“And what about you, huh?  _ Little Y/N? _ What do you think your mom would say if she saw you right now?” Tsukishima spat, using the one thing we knew was your weakness against you. Your heart dropped.

“Tsukki!” Yamaguchi whispered with wide eyes. Tsukishima knew he went too far and regretted his words before they even left his mouth as your eyes instantly changed from angry to distantly hurt. He had been too caught up in the heat of the moment and stepped over the line he knew was firmly drawn since the first time he heard your father call you that. 

“ _ Little Y/N.” _

The name your father always sneered at you whenever he was angry. You hadn’t heard that name in years. But you stood there, silent and frozen, feeling like a weak 7 year old again, preparing for the worst. Seeing your pained face, Tsukishima stepped forward and interrupted the silence. “Y/N, I-I’m so sorry. I d-didn’t mean to say tha-” as he reached out his hand, you only saw your father’s and flinched, instinctively wincing and bracing yourself. He jerked his hand back, feeling his stomach sink. 

“Y/N? Are you oka-” Yamaguchi asked cautiously. You couldn’t move. Yamaguchi started slowly walking towards you, trying to see if you were okay.

“Don’t,” you whispered, barely loud enough for anyone but yourself to hear. 

“What?” Yamaguchi asked, slightly bending down to see your face and hear what you had said.

“Don’t-don’t touch me,” you whispered a little louder. Your silver lined eyes were still in a distant place as you reached for your bag and rushed out of the silent gym. The whole team watched you walk out. Turning their attention back to Tsukishima, they saw him with his head held low, running his hands through his short blond hair. Tsukishima stayed standing in the same place, not listening to what Yamaguchi was saying to him. He finally realized how deeply he cared for you. That was why he was so angry. But his ignorance about it caused him to hurt you in a way he wasn’t sure he could recover from. 

Everyone had seen the whole interaction, but you didn’t care. You couldn’t focus on anything except the image of your father raising his hand against you. Tsukishima even mentioned your mom. The feeling of getting beat by your dad was replaced by the image of your mother getting dragged out of your front door on a stretcher and him getting shoved into the back of a cop car with his hands bound in handcuffs behind his back. You didn’t realize you were crying until you stopped in the street, clutching your chest. You couldn’t catch your breath. Knowing Yamaguchi and Tsukishima were probably following you, you quickly raced home. Unlocking your front door, you paused for a moment, seeing a vision of your father passed out on the couch with countless beer cans and bottles on the living room table. Blinking, your eyes readjusted to see the clean living room just as you had left it from earlier when you left for school. Wiping your eyes, you went upstairs and locked your bedroom door before falling into bed. You had too much on your mind to actually get under the covers so you just turned to face the wall and cried.

-

You woke up to the sound of banging on your front door. The sound only reminded you of your father so you clenched the pillow in your hands, bringing it up to cover your ears to block out the noise. The banging stopped and a lighter knock replaced it.

“Y/N? Y/N we know you’re home,” Yamaguchi called. Though, looking up at your dark window, he wasn’t sure. “Please let us in.” He looked up to Tsukishima who stood silently next to him, wondering what they should do next. Tsukishima gave him a defeated shrug, turning to walk back down your front steps. Sighing, Yamaguchi just followed.

-

You didn’t show up to school the next day. Or the next. Yamaguchi didn’t have to ask to tell that Tsukishima was worried. The entire volleyball team could tell too, by the way he was distracted each practice, making mistakes on simple things, being either completely silent or lashing out more than usual. A few days later, he finally saw you by your locker quietly putting your books away with your head down. 

“Y/N!” You winced at the sound of his voice but tried to ignore him. He had been rehearsing his apology the entire time but when he finally saw you, he didn’t know what to say. It didn’t matter though because once he finally caught up to you, you didn’t give him time to say anything. You slammed your locker door and walked off, dismissing his presence entirely. Never once in the years of you being friends had you given up the chance to tease him; but now you didn’t even say a word. He stared at your back as you disappeared into your classroom, finally realizing the irreparable damage he had done. 

His heart physically ached as he realized he lost you. 


End file.
